Firstly, let me compliment you on how impressively big and strong you look. Are you aware that half of you, approximately, is water? Today you will be moving into the front paddock to dry off in the sun. This will happen slowly over the next six months, and should feel nice and natural. After that you'll be split. Ouch! Sorry about that.
So to get to the front paddock you will be manipulated carefully into the wheelbarrow and rolled into the back of the trailer. You will then enjoy a short ride around the driveway - nothing too bumpy. Then you will be rolled out of the trailer, encouraged with a slow push from a gardening boot, and you'll join your friends in the stack.
Oh, I counted your rings - you're over forty years old! Wow! Congratulations! I promise I will make this new transition in your woody life as gentle as possible.
Yours, the Head Gardener
Saturday 30th June
I've already spent ages rolling lots of logs down the lawn slope ready for the pick-up. I've raked up more mess, and cranked up the bonfire. And thought strong thoughts about how older-lady gardeners can do anything.
Taking a Photo of the Log Wall
And then they can do exactly the same 'anythings' the next day, and the next. Because older lady gardeners are tenacious, like tough old game birds. They are also very wise - they can look into the future, and understand what needs to be done in their gardens to get there. Ha! Which for me means getting all this wood 'down and dusted' before spring. Spring is when I will resow the driveway lawn.
The Last Stand of Gum Trees
Of course, there are other winter tasks : horse manure to add to various gardens, and mulch to shovel and spread on paths. Some more trimming of perennials is needed, and pretty soon the roses can be pruned. Oh boy. Now there's a task and a half. I have quite a number of roses. Perhaps too many? No way!
Tenacious or not, I need the trailer and the car to tow it, in order to shift the logs into the front paddock. The latter (I mean the car) has had to go to work this week. But yesterday it took the day off. Great excitement! Alas - it went up to the local ski-field. Hmm... So today, Saturday, is shifting and stacking day. I will try my very best. I will have some strong-arms man-help later on. When I run out of either oomph or daylight (whichever comes first) I will stop.
Five Hours later...
Buster the black cat has been supervising from the modest heights of the flowering cherry tree. The dogs have been snoozing in the car. Quality family time, hee hee.
Buster in the Driveway
I ran out of oomph. And upper-arm strength, motivation, energy, puff, upper leg strength, foot strength, mental strength... But I've stacked heaps and heaps. Non-Gardening Partner has chain-sawn up the final pieces of wood - there are just a few huge chunks of wood bigger than his chain-saw left. Now it's time to reflect proudly with a glass of House Merlot, and - ahem - write up my Gardening Log...