Gardener with No Energy
Gardening energy is so annoyingly finite - at least it is for me. My gardening plans stretch on for ever and ever. I start a gardening day with plans for full scale developments, and nearly always end up getting nowhere.
Just once I'd like to look around and see absolutely everything completely finished, all at the same time - I'd like to know how this feels. For example, I wish I could blink and then see the whole of the water race cleared. Instead it's like a cruel nightmarish joke - when I finally finish the garage end, the other end has thriving colonies of new weeds. My vision never matches my stamina.
I think of the most sensible and amazing plant-shiftings when I am dog tired and couldn't lift another spade. It's just not fair. Nothing seems to fit.
Why can't I find some hidden endurance and actually finish something in the garden? I don't even finish the little things. How will I ever get, for example, a second large pond dug and planted in the Frisbee Lawn? I am fated to look at glossy pictures each summer while the Frisbee Lawn's grass gets as browned off as I am.
Dog with No Energy
What about hiring a secret staff of under-gardeners? They could have special powers, enabling them to move about silently, disappearing into the bushes whenever I arrived. One of them could collect the Autumn leaves and bag them to make leaf mould. Another could deadhead the summer daisies. A third could rake gum leaves off the house lawns after every hot blustery Nor-west wind...
Too random? Too many lists?
Perhaps I am too random? if this is the case, then possibly all I need to do is to become random on a bigger scale. Perhaps I write down too many lists? My diaries may be hindering my gardening progress rather than organising and helping it. Am I becoming better at writing about the garden than actually working in it?
Kitten with No Energy
Am I afraid of being a gardening failure? Maybe I need to acknowledge my fears - frost, rust, no friends, marauding cattle, eternal winter, the day when the water race stops running, the morning when I have no more gardening energy left...
Perhaps the company I keep in the Moosey garden just isn't good and sharp enough to keep me on my toes. The dog is too old, the duck is too scared, the cats are too sleepy, the visiting rooster is too busy pecking at my tomatoes...
Non-Gardening Partner with No Energy
Then there is Non-Gardening Partner - he's brilliant at going for long bicycle rides at exactly the wrong times (for example whenever a giant Autumn burn-up is happening). Of course he needs the exercise - but there's nothing like raking debris and trotting back and forth with a wheelbarrow to sharpen up essential muscles.
Changes are definitely needed. I probably need to befriend a bulldozer driver, get a new puppy, and stop being so boring. What about a garden motto? - 'Grow For Garden Glory' seems to have the right tone - and I need to stop twittering on, bury the computer, and just get OUT THERE.